Its funny how sometimes we start doing something to achieve a goal, but the actions end up taking on a life of their own. I have a friend for example, who made a new year’s resolution a few years back to lose a little bit of weight. She did this because she wanted to live a more robust and balanced lifestyle. Having lost the weight though, her training turned into an obsession. Everything now is about her training schedule and dietry regime.
Its a little bit sad really, she originally went out to give herself a better life yet now she cannot even enjoy many of its simple joys. Eating popcorn at the movies fills her with guilt. A dinner out with friends will be finished early if she has training tomorrow. She isn’t actually training for anything specific, yet her regime rules her life.
I have another friend who used to be the ultimate family man. Everything he did at work was driven by his desire to improve the lifestyle and standard of living of his wife and children. He just loved going home and sharing the fruits of his labours with them.
One day, my friend was promoted. A worthy promotion as he really was the top performer at work, both in his own right and in the way he got the best out of all the people who reported to him. When he received this promotion, something changed. Quality of life stopped being his priority. Time with his wife stopped being his purpose. Rather, he started validating himself by furthering himself at work, by future promotions and by where he was placed on the corporate ladder.
Both of these friends of mine have become slaves in today’s world. They have become slaves because they have lost sight of the things they were working for. Having lost sight of these things, work is the only thing that is left for them. Work has become their lives.
With my first friend, she originally wanted to lose some weight and live a healthier, fuller and happier lifestyle. Losing sight of this, she now trains and eats to a regimen that excludes life outside this regimen. My second friend now sees time spent with his wife as a competing interest to time spent at the office, a constraint which gets in the way of his commitment to the job.
Historically, this has never been a normal way of living. Historically, people only ever did what they had to do to support themselves and their loved ones. What time was left was honoured as time to enjoy, time to share. There was only one group of people for whom work was the end game in life, and we called them slaves. Its interesting that today, despite slavery being outlawed, people still live in a similar manner.
Ask yourself if there is work in your life which serves no purpose. It could be an exercise regime, a career, or even your perception on keeping your home overly clean.
If there is, have you become a slave to an idea? Are you toiling for no purpose. Remember you only have one life, so review this work and try to work out what it will bring you in 10 - 20 years? Will you look back on your toil and smile at the benefits it brought you? Or will you look back and see a landscape of opportunities missed?
Typically we become slaves to ideas when we lose sight of the important things in life. We do this when we get so absorbed in the work we are doing, we forget to look at the broader picture. The quickest way to rectify this issue is to take a timeout. Spend a little time away from everything and get your head together again. Think about the things which are and will be really important over the course of your life, not just now. Forget about what everyone else is telling you, look into your heart and find your own perspective. Because once you find that perspective, you will throw the shackles of your self imposed slavery aside and get out of your rut.
You’ll know you have done this well when the things that are important to you, are things that your work can “buy“, not measurements of your work. For example, a career oriented goal should not be completing the project on time and under budget, it should be affording that holiday in Tahiti. And a fitness goal should not be losing 20kg and improving your resting pulse to 68 beats per minute, it should be being competitive while playing tennis with a bunch of friends, which you will follow up with a guilt free meal and a couple of drinks.
Going through this type of process, if done properly, will give you perspective. Once you have it, you will be in control of your life again. And being back in control, you’ll see work or training is there to support a higher purpose. And from here, you’ll have a vantage point from which you can recognise better methods, and oppotunities to find a better path to your goals. You won’t be stuck, trapped as a slave to your ideas.
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